The New Year

 It's been a while. So long, in fact, that when I re-read my last post, which is something I like to do before I write a new one, I find myself crying, AGAIN, just remembering that moment in the car. Ugh. SNiffle, leak, sniffle. What a way to start the morning. 

I've actually been audio blogging of sorts in the car on longer rides (my commute is an hour each way, so.. that counts!), and I'm going to try to figure out a way to either transcribe those or just put them on here. I am sure no one reads this, but it's cathartic to be able to look back and see how things went "back in the day", relive moments you forgot (good or bad), and remember where you came from. 

So, funny story, we have three dogs again. How, you ask? You went from thinking you were nuts to getting ANOTHER dog?? Yeah. well, there's a story- like with everything else in this silly blog. 

Right around mid December, things were starting to be.. less hellish in my head. I was crying less, and although Vera was still not being ridden, I had attempted to take her out for walks. Tater was doing really well, and Loki was perking up. Tater was also starting to beat the ever loving merciless crap out of Loki, so.. that was a problem. We were also back to the issue of... 12 year old dog, and now puppy. So when Loki goes, (I do not even want to think about that. There may be a sabbatical taken.) we're still down to one dog. So, with Logan's mom having 4 puppies and Ellie, we reached out to her and offered to take one more. So, up comes Cowboy on New Years Day via Gary's Transport. LOL 

Cowboy is.. Tater's polar opposite. LoL He is laid-back, a little fearful, the omega in Angie's pack, and was completely ignorant when he came. He came with counter surfing, resource guarding, and a short fuse for "rough play", as he's also about 3" shorter than Tater, who was the runt of the litter. He was... kind of a mess. But as of now, he is settling in nicely and turning into a loverly little mutt. We work on manners and obedience daily, take walks, and separate the two for individual "tuning", and.. he's starting to really blossom into a nice pup. Tater, on the other hand... is still very much Tater. At least Loki is not getting beat up as much. Now it's puppy on puppy chaos. hahah

Vera is back to work- We started back with lessons in January, because I made a resolution to do so. And so far, it's sticking. I heart my little mare, so you wouldn't think it would be a tough resolution, but I still have all the PTSD and fear sticking around, clogging up the works. It's so insidious- I'm like... what a nice day, I should take Vera for a ride! I get dressed, drag my stuff out, then notice that... XYZ is off. And... get sidetracked. By the time I'm done, it's dark and Vera is like.. Mom, why is all my stuff out and nothing happened?? I get myself so frustrated on those days. But.. I keep taking my lessons so I have one dedicated day to ride, and then usually get in 1-2 more off the high of a successful lesson. And so.. it's going. 

I am also trying to work out a bit- I remember Steph telling me that around 30 she noticed her strength starting to decline and that's when she started working out. It took me to 36, so booyah! But.. the day is here. So, I started working out with a Youtube coach (Caroline Girvan) this week and was surprised when I noticed some muscles being worked that almost never get worked on "typical" Youtube strengthening workouts. So, neato for her!  We'll see how long it sticks. But.. I would really like to keep riding and not turn into a ball of jelly, so I'm going to try. But ohhhhh... Am I sore. LMAO SO SORE!!! I worked out Mon and WEdnesday AM, then rode in my lesson yesterday and it could be the power of positive thinking, but I do think I noticed that I was activating my pelvic stabilizers better just because they were sore so I was noticing them when they were being stretched or worked. Shrug. Whatever works, right?? Today is arms day.. Hence I got sidetracked on my blog. hahah

As for other aspects of the farm, I'm getting better and utilizing rabbit meat- I found a new way to harvest and it works better for me. Like.. it makes logical sense, so I can get through it much faster, and the meat is more usable after because she explained how to package it in more usable quantities. Score! 

We went through a period of rats- RATS!!!- in the house walls. And I lost my shit, called Terminix, and started killing rats left and right. We no longer have little scurrying feet everywhere, so something worked. I need to work on some other things around here to increase the odds of that continuing, but.. I'm hopeful we nipped that problem mostly in the bud. Although I did have a dream last night that they ate through the wires in my kitchen, so clearly I'm still bothered by their presence. Mrr. 

The garden is being planned currently- I'm putting in raised beds this year because I just have better luck with them. The sawmill that came through and took care of all the giant logs laying around got us 6000 board feet of lumber for the barn(YAY!!!), and.. we have Claire's dually truck sitting proudly in our driveway (don't ask me how I'm paying for it.. I feel like I should have a kid so the bank can just take it- I mean.. a blond/blue, smart, athletic, good looking baby's gotta be worth something, right?? And.. I'm being presumptuous, but coming from Logan and me, that kid stands a good chance of being an Aryan wet dream. bahah). Hmm.. Maybe I'm onto something... ;)